Catching up…

4 Aug

Ok, so my dreams of becoming a big-time blogger were short lived…very short lived…I wrote one whole blog.  But I am back, refocused, rededicated and I’ve got lots to say 🙂

Since my first and last blog, 10 months ago (I bow my head in shame) a lot has happened, to say the least. Kacy and I decided to one-up my idea of blogging about our babymaking adventures and ended up sharing them on a docu-series on Showtime called The Real L Word (thus the blogging hiatus). For anyone who didn’t watch the show and for those who did but want more detail then the editors who chopped our life up into pieces chose to show, I will start from somewhere close to the beginning….

Kacy and I want to be parents, we are ready to be parents and we cannot wait to be parents. If only really, really wanting something was enough to make it happen. Unfortunately, as we quickly learned, it’s not. We started this journey with grand ideas of how we thought things would/should work, we were a bit delusional. We figured it would go something like: Get baby batter, inject baby batter, wait 9 months, become mommies. We were obviously wrong. We had a lot to learn.

Our first hurdle was deciding who the lucky donor would be. We originally wanted someone we knew, someone we trusted. Convincing one of our friends to not only give us the gift of life, but also do it on television was harder than we thought. So we switched to plan B. We found an incredible sperm bank, Xytex (I’ll post a link to their website below). They had so many great donors with extensive profiles, medical histories, and personal essays and even had pictures of them as children and adults.  We found a donor that we both agreed was “the one”. And the baby-making began.

As many of you may have witnessed, our first insemination was unsuccessful. It was heartbreaking. We now know that this process can take a very long time, but back then we thought we would be special. Maybe we thought that because we were sharing the most intimate details of our lives on television that the universe would have to give us a happy ending. How can a series following a couple trying to get pregnant not end with a baby? Oh, it can, and it did.

Since we began this process in February we have inseminated five times, the last being thirteen days ago. Since the show ended so many people have asked if I was pregnant, I wasn’t avoiding the question because I didn’t want to share with you (it’s a little too late for that) I just simply didn’t know.  Well, now I do, and I am not. It was a hard day, the hardest yet actually. This time around I tried the hormones, I took Clomid and also an HCG injection. I really, truly believed this time was going to be it. With the hell the hormones put me through I figured it had to work, the baby gods owed it to me. So when I woke up this morning to be proven wrong, I was devastated. I am so grateful to have Kacy, she is so supportive and loving and really knows how to keep me together when I just want to fall apart (as many of you probably noticed). She is my rock and if the universe decides that it will only be her and I, I will be ok with that. But until then we are going to keep trying, I will do whatever I need to do. I will take the crazy hormones, I will drink the teas and take the herbs, I will continue fertility acupuncture (by the way my acupuncturist is amazing, her info is below as well) I will try every doctor, specialist or medicine man under the sun. We are in this and there is no one else I would rather be in this with than her.

What also has helped get me through today was all of the tweets and Facebook messages we have received from perfect strangers. I have and always will read every single one. So many of you have taken the time out of your busy lives to let us know we are in your thought and prayers, to let us know that we are supported and to even open up share your stories with us. You have reminded me that we are not alone in this and made me even more thankful that we were giving such an amazing opportunity.

I promise to keep this blog updated with any news, good or bad and continue sharing this journey we are on with anyone who wants to stick around.

Also, if you have any blog ideas for me I would love to hear them. I am sure you have heard enough sperm talk to last a lifetime so let me know what you want to know! I am an open book. 🙂

Love to you all and thanks for reading!

XO
C

As promised:

Xytex Sperm Bank – http://xytex.com/

Virginia @ Tower Acupuncture:  (310) 230-5489 – Santa Monica, Ca

You should also check out our friends website http://itsconceivablenow.com

You can also chat with us on twitter – @CoriCupcake & @KacyChristine or on Our Facebook page – https://www.facebook.com/pages/Cori-and-Kacy-The-real-L-Word-2/209633879075623

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80 Responses to “Catching up…”

  1. Maury Mayen August 4, 2011 at 7:55 am #

    I just want to say I am one of those perfect strangers. I totally love you guys and i wish you guys the best!! If i had a magic wand that could make women pregnant at a whisk you guys would be the first ones! You guys are in my prayers and i reallly do hope you guys get pregnant! You guys deserve it! Much love and luck. By the way i am so sad the show has ended -.- please post when u get news about a season 3 😉 ❤

  2. paola August 4, 2011 at 7:57 am #

    I am so sorry to hear that your not pregnant but im glad that your staying positive or atleast trying your hardest to. You and kacy are wonderful people that deserve to have a beautiful baby i believe soon you guys will! thank you for letting us into your world and keep us updated… sending nothing but love

    ps ill pray for you guys to get pregnant and will be setting some lilies free in the ocean for you guys 🙂

  3. Noemí August 4, 2011 at 7:57 am #

    I’m so sorry it didn’t work this time… but keep the faith and stay calm. Babies love calm to come not stress.
    We are really far away (Barcelona, Spain) but my girl and I will pray to the Gods of pregnancy (lol) for you to have a baby soon 🙂
    Keep in touch. You both are now part of our lives. ❤

  4. Jen&Cori August 4, 2011 at 8:05 am #

    Hey kid. Cori and I were wondering what is going on, so thanks for the update. I know myself it sucks to have to talk about something that you’re stuggling with. Kinda makes me wanna vomit trying to explain to others things I don’t know myself. So, I won’t ask and we will be patient and here when you’re ready to tell. Now, go smoke a big ole pissed of cigarette. I’ll smoke one here for you and as I’m ashing I’ll say “This is for my homies” 😉

  5. Kelley Anderson August 4, 2011 at 8:09 am #

    Cori & Kacy –

    FIrst of all, I absolutely love the blog! And I loved both of you on The Real L Word!

    My girlfriend and I (legally my wife someday soon!) have been together for a little over seven years. I am so ready for the next chapter to begin and have a baby too!

    I just wanted to tell you ladies that I cried my eyes out with you every episode and feel your need and want to have children too.

    I am still rooting for you and will keep you in my thoughts for lots of fertility & that you will be able to make your family grow bigger soon!

  6. Rachel Travis August 4, 2011 at 8:09 am #

    I wish you guys the very best of luck. You guys are such an awesome couple. We really loved ya’ll on the show!

  7. Danielle August 4, 2011 at 8:23 am #

    Best of a luck from a breeder in the same shoes. 😦 Keeping the positive mental attitude! I know how much CD1 is a gutter! You guys have a truly beautiful love and you just have to remember that (one way or another….) you will get the accessory to your lives you so truly desire! YAY BABIES! 🙂

  8. Emmanuelle August 4, 2011 at 1:27 am #

    oh Cori. so sad to hear that you are not pregnant. Watching you on the show but also reading your blog has made me realize that this journey is not an easy one. Like you, I was so sure that a trip to the sperm bank would do the trick and then “kaboom”, here we go! my partner and I will start the process next year so lets keep our fingers crossed for all of us out there trying. Stay strong! thinking of you all the way from Hong Kong. x

  9. Kerry Rogers August 4, 2011 at 1:31 am #

    I am from Uk and watch the Real L word and have to say, u guys really have made the show for me. You show what true love is and that lesbians can live happily together without being tempted to other woman. Am sorry to hear u didnt get pregnant but as they say, good things come to good people and so I can see u ending up with triplets. lol. Keep trying, dont give up, you both will make great parents. Good luck and keep smiling.

    Kerry ( from England) xxxx

  10. Jennifer M Shallow-Weldon August 4, 2011 at 1:31 am #

    I would like to thank you for sharing your life w us on the L Word!! I wish u all the love and luck in the world 🙂

  11. Shawna August 4, 2011 at 1:33 am #

    Me an my husband have followed u two the whole way I know how u feel. Ive had 3 miscarrages myself… Its hard amen, but you two are so strong u an inspire me. Thanks… Ps my husband says u can have as much sperm as u want… Lol hes hoping u two get your lil angel/ we are hoping!!!! You have your own prayer with me tonight

  12. Hannah Edwards August 4, 2011 at 1:34 am #

    Hi. Soo sorry it has not been going well. It is a hard road. It worked first time for me easy peasy. We have a great 3 year old now but 2nd time around my partner tried 4 times with the 3rd a miscarriage and then I tried 4 times again with the 1st time a miscarriage. I know it heart breaking and hard to carry on (and expensive) but don’t give up if you have the strength to carry on. Best wishes for you. Thinking positive fertile thoughts.

  13. Tina L August 4, 2011 at 1:38 am #

    I’m sorry to hear there is no baby yet. Hopefully with all the prayers being sent out for you both (mine included 🙂 a baby will be sent to you soon. You both are very inspiring. Me and my wife loved watching both of you this season. Any chance you will be back on next season?

  14. ceceinengland August 4, 2011 at 1:47 am #

    I wish you the best, you are such a lovely and cute couple, so much harmony between you two that’s amazing. Many thoughts and prayers from France.

  15. Chelsea Dominguez August 4, 2011 at 2:08 am #

    C&K-
    I’ve never heard of anyone more deserving of a child than you two. Thank you for being such an incredible, healthy, and positive portrayal of lesbians and our relationships. You two really are the “unicorn couple” that gives the rest of us hope. I’ll be praying for your family, and its future addition. With that much love between two people, it would be impossible for it not to spill out and create something precious.
    Love always,
    Chels

  16. amber August 4, 2011 at 2:16 am #

    i love you two! Cori- your such a sweet outgoing bubbly woman with a huge heart 🙂 and Kacy your fertility ceremony was one of the sweetest things ive ever seen. your so supportive and you seem to know what to say to help each moment pass smoothly. im happy that in a world where things are so cruel and evil (can be) you two have found eachother and have a truly everlasting love ❤ stay strong ladies. youve touched my heart and im rooting for you girls xo

  17. aalia August 4, 2011 at 2:26 am #

    Thank you for sharing this journey with all of us. No matter how good your support network is, it can be really tough if there is no one sharing the ‘getting pregnant’ journey with you. It must have been scary opening up your lives, and frustrating at seeing what the Real L Word decided to air. My beautiful girlfriend & I watched avidly and have been wondering for days what the latest results were and we’re sad with you that they aren’t what you hoped. One day you two will be beautiful mummies (sorry – mommies!) and in the meantime, keep strong and keep loving each other.

  18. Melody Valier August 4, 2011 at 2:51 am #

    I am so sorry for your heartbreak! I cried when I read this! We still struggle with the baby issue after 13 years (to have or not), but we only talked to IVF Centers (3 of them!!!). We don’t personally know you, but love you guys!!! We felt finally there was a couple like us out there! I am more crazy in love today then when we first met. I wish you as much luck as I can!!! My partner actually worked for two IVF centers & said 7 tries always seem to be the one that worked…. BUT I am not trying to get your hopes up too high, just telling you what she told me. Good Luck!!!

  19. Wendy Lewis Mulligan August 4, 2011 at 3:24 am #

    My heart aches for you. I’m a 39 year old mother of two children from a former relationship and I live with my 12 year old son and my partner. We’ve talked back and forth about her becoming pregnant because she has no children of her own. The fact of the matter is that it’s just too damn expensive and there are no guarantees. I’m sorry this is such an arduous process for you. I will pray and hope and pray again for a “baby outcome.” Keep in mind, you’re young and have some time yet. Good luck Cori. You two are my absolute favorites on the Real L Word and I think you should have your own show!!! Much love girls ❤ Wendy Mulligan

  20. Keri & Jen August 4, 2011 at 4:16 am #

    So sorry ladies! I’m sure it’s been a tough few days. I too have a blog but everytime I start back at Day 1 I stop blogging. You & Kacy are in my thoughts because my partner and I are in your shoes. Hopefully the planets align soon for all of us baby-making mamas. Hugs to you! ❤

  21. Danielle August 4, 2011 at 5:14 am #

    Cori, my husband and I discovered your story on the show (we adore you and Kacy) and we were instantly drawn in. We have had 12 failed IVFs and are now moving on to using donor eggs to start our family. The love and trust that you and Kacy have will get you through the long (and sometimes frustrating and disappointing) road to becoming parents. Your baby hasn’t found you yet but when she/he does, there will be so much love for this child – friends, family, and even people like me who are rooting for you from afar. All good thoughts and love for you and Kacy on your journey! xoxo

  22. Linz & Jax August 4, 2011 at 5:47 am #

    Hey ladies! Just wanted to say my partner and I loooooved watching you two on the Real L Word this season. You were pretty much the only reason we kept tuning in, I’m not gonna lie 😉 We pretty much cried every episode either because we were sad for you and your baby-makin woes, or because we were so happy that another couple exists that so closely resembles our own relationship! We’ll keep you and your (future) baby in our thoughts!

  23. Lamisha August 4, 2011 at 5:51 am #

    Cori,

    I want to first tell you what a great couple you and Kacy are. I love that I can watch a show like The Real L Word and see a couple like myself and my partner on the show. I think it is amazing what you are doing and let you know it will happen for you two. How can it not happen when you have two people that love each other so much and want nothing more than to have a little bundle of joy. My partner and I have an amazing little boy and I know you and Kacy will soon have your own. Your journey has only just begun and while it make get harder before it gets easier, it will all be worth it when you get to hold your little one for the first time. I am sending good vibes into the universe for you today…

    P.S. I know you have tried acupuncture, have you read into or thought about doing Reiki ? It’s energy work that helps unblock energy fields in your body, it might help. Would be worth talking to a Reiki therapist anyways. Just a thought. 🙂

  24. Siobhan August 4, 2011 at 5:54 am #

    Hey to both of you I just wanted to say me and my girlfriend watched the show in the Internet because we don’t always get it here in the UK! We really relate to u guys for many reasons and it’s so refreshing to see a settled happy lesbian couple on the tv! U guys are amazing I can’t imagine how disappointing and how hard it must be to keep going through the baby process but I just wanted to say u 2 are natural parents and I’m sure u will make brilliant mommies one day. until then I wish u every bit of luck from rainy london I will keep updated on your blog facebook and twitter love and hugs Siobhan and nic xxx

  25. Wendy Vlissides August 4, 2011 at 5:56 am #

    Cori,
    I was where you are now about 3 years ago and I totally empathize with your situation. I know what it feels like to go month to month with constant disappointment. But please try to look at it this way, each time you try, you two are just getting closer and closer to having your little baby or babies :). It WILL happen. I attribute finally getting pregnant to cutting out alcohol, NSAIDs and cutting way back on caffeine. Also, two weeks before we did IVF, I had a swedish and reflexology massage. I truly believe it helped relax me enough to conceive. We had to do IVF because I have endometriosis and we ended up with twins which could very easily happen to you as well :). They are a blessing. One that you and Kacy will experience one day whether you have a singleton or more :). Have you asked your doctor about a very simple procedure called HSG (Hysterosalpingogram)? Its very quick, noninvasive and it can help some women get pregnant. Its basically an xray of your fallopian tubes and by injecting the dye to view them, you are ‘flushing’ things out sorta speak, making a clearer path for your eggs to travel down.
    Ive had so many friends that have been or are in your situation and eventually they have all become pregnant, and you will too ;). You and Kacy are too great together as a couple, not to be blessed as parents. It WILL happen and all of this work and disappointment will be a distant memory and will be so worth it! Good luck! sending you lots of good baby vibes 🙂
    Love,
    Wendy

  26. Tina Compton August 4, 2011 at 6:12 am #

    WOW! I have never prayed so hard, and normally the good Lord has been kind. Ugh!!! Well, I know you read all your messages, and have been very generous, sharing your lives with us all, and we are grateful to have others like you that are real people.

    Ana and I started our journey 5 years ago. We were referred to a fertility clinic here in the city that we live in, by other lesbian couples that were taking the same road. Once we got in to the clinic, we came to realize Ana had Polycystic ovary syndrome and also discovered that she had Hypothyroidism. These were two things against us during this whole process.

    Dr. Cepeda, from the Hart Fertility Clinic http://www.hartfertility.ca prescribed medication for the Thyroid, which Ana continues to take daily. We faithfully went to the clinic every month for 7 months before the IVF took place the first time. Dr. Cepeda stated that the size of the ovaries would almost guaranteed a pregnancy. ( Ana also took Clomid ) ….. We were inseminated. It was the longest 2 weeks of our relationship.. LOL! I know you understand that feeling… haha!

    2 days before we needed to go in to verify we were pregnant we got a pregnancy test at the market and it was positive. YAhhhhh!!! So after 8 months of clinical it was a success.
    and that’s where Issiah came from. He’s 4 and a half now.

    We used http://www.fairfaxcryobank.com to select a donor. I was in the same boat as Kacy, until I started looking through some of the profiles. I wanted the donor to have my nationality, so that there would be some resemblance. We had friends that offered to assist us in the process but thought that it would cause some long term issues and we decided not to take that route. It kind of reminded me of “If these walls could talk 2” with Ellen DeGeneres and Sharon Stone, when they browse through there catalog and select a donor, it made the process a little adventurous.

    Then we went back to the clinic shortly after Isaiah was born, there was only one sample of the same donor left and we wanted to have biological siblings, so we rushed back to do it all over again… So a few months, monitoring ovulation, than BAM! inseminate. LOL!

    Sample #2, we were successful again, and Liam was born 9 months later. he’s 2 and a half now.

    I know not all women are this lucky. I also have an older son Jacob, who is 14 years old, and he comes from a previous relationship, and I gave birth to him.

    There is a lot involved in the circle of life, and I just want you both to know that everything happens for a reason. Just remember with the raging hormones and everything else that comes, you will always have each other, no matter what. Be strong for each, and most importantly, take this journey together, it will be a pleasurable experience and if you can both enjoy the ride.

    I would highly recommend the Hart Fertility Clinic, I know its here in Canada, and I have nothing against all the other fertility clinics, but I have 6 same sex couples that have had successful full term pregnancies here, and if you need a place to stay, your all welcome.

    Just don’t give up, I’m sure all 7000 of your fans and followers are giving you the same advise. But Ana and I have been there, we’ve done it all, and have a beautiful family of 5.

    All the best, please keep in touch, I would love to chat with you both personally.

    The Compton Family. xoxox

  27. Melissa Scanlan August 4, 2011 at 6:18 am #

    Good luck ladies, keep your head up! It will happen 🙂 PS you guys were my favs on the show 🙂 Just watched the season finale last night and was hoping you would get pregnant in the finale. I am hoping to start the same process as you within the next couple of years so it was great to see what it’s like on the show – doesn’t really make me look forward to it though 😦 haha My thoughts are with you both that you will soon get pregnant. I know you will be wonderful parents!

  28. tina and heather August 4, 2011 at 6:27 am #

    Gosh reading this blog reminds me of my wife and I. Its so rough to go through but we live in Virginia and use the fairfax cryo bank. They ladies there are nice and the sperm (yuck yuck) as I call it seems to be a bit cheaper than other sites we’ve checked. We’ve tried 8 times one pregnancy that ended in a miscarriage. We still have our heads up and will try again soon.

    But seriously check out the Fairfax Cryobanks website.

  29. Susie August 4, 2011 at 6:28 am #

    You all will one day have a baby i have faith in you guys you guys remind me of me and my girlfriend. we are actually considering having a baby.. and have been and seeing you guys has inspired us more ty for being strong

  30. Brittani August 4, 2011 at 6:53 am #

    Dear Cori and Kasey,
    I have watched you on The Real L Word, and now I am following you on twitter and now the blog, I’m a lesbian and I have been in a relationship with my fiance for 5 years now, we have known eachother for almost 10 years, and you two give us hope that this will be us in the future. I really hope that you two get pregnant soon, You both are going to be great mommies!!! Baby Dust to you Cori!!!!! Keep us updated!!!!!

  31. Krista Martinez August 4, 2011 at 6:54 am #

    Thank you so much for sharing your story! My wife and i are just starting out on our baby journey and you ars such an inspiration! Good luck and ill keep praying for you!

  32. ashez728 August 4, 2011 at 7:19 am #

    Oh my heart just broke reading this update. I was really hoping you finally had a baby cooking after all that batter. I loved following your story on The Real L Word and am so happy to follow your blog. I will continue to be one of those perfect strangers that continues to send out positive baby vibes to you and Kacy.

  33. Kelly & Stacey August 4, 2011 at 7:19 am #

    My wife and I very much enjoy following you both on the show, and were very disappointed to see it end, lol. We hope to see you both again next year, and we both have all the faith in the world that you will indeed conceive. Its amazing to see another couple such as ourselves so happy and in love, and any baby would be so lucky to have you both as parents! We wish you and Kacy nothing but the best, and you both are in our baby batter/ turkey basting/ baby making prayers 🙂

    Best wishes,
    Kelly & Stacey

  34. Kat August 4, 2011 at 7:21 am #

    My fiance and I loved you guys on The Real L Word. We hoped so bad we would be able to see you pregnant before the show ended. But as you both realized it’s not that simple. We were very intrigued by the process because in about 2 years we will start our journey to becoming mommies together. I, myself have a daughter who is 6 and asks everyday when she will get a lil sis or lil brother. I just want to say thank you for sharing your lives with us. We saw a lot of you two in us. We cannot wait to start our journey together and watching you two brought us closer together. We now have more insight of what it takes to go through that baby making process and I can only hope I’m half as good to my fiance as Kacy has been for you. Love you both! We are sending our positive thoughts and hoping you two become mommies soon!

  35. Nicole A. Northrop August 4, 2011 at 7:39 am #

    I am sorry for your continued struggle with infertiltiy. I struggled with infertility greatly before having my second daughter Melanie. I did clomid 4 cycles with no success-then I did injections of follistim injections followed by the HCG trigger shot. My cycle with follistim and the HCG trigger shot were successful and my husband and I welcomed our daughter Melanie Mae on December 23, 2008. There is a supplement called fertilaid. Have you tried that? I have heard a lot of people have had tons of success with it! Anyhow-I wanted you to know I know your pain of dealing with infertility. It is something that unless you go through it someone cannot fully understand. It takes a strong support system. Try to take some reccomendations with a grain of salt. I know if I heard “just don’t try so hard”, or “just pray” one more time I might have snapped. These comments usually come from those not experiencing infertility. I kept thinking if only they knew HOW MUCH I prayed. Keep your head up, keep trying, and it will happen. Miracles do happen and you both deserve it.

  36. Nicki August 4, 2011 at 7:48 am #

    Thank you ladies for sharing your story. I wish you all the best….hang in there. I went through SEVERAL cycles of IVF..so I understand the hormone crazies!! I also know what its like to eat, sleep and breath getting pregnant. Everyone you see is pregnant, everywhere you go!! Try not to get sick of people saying..’relax, it will happen’.(they just don’t know what else to say)..I got to where I thought I would punch the next person that said that! LOL..and I’m a nice person!! It’s also hard to hear people that don’t know you ask ‘Do you have any children?’ and after my reply of ‘no’..they would say..’oh good for you!..Your smart!’….little did they know I would give anything to have a baby puking on my shoulder, or willingly be so tired from being up all night with a crying baby…..I’m glad you wrote in your blog that if the universe doesn’t decide to bless you and your love with a child you are ok with just having your wife by your side, this is important, and imperative that you keep this in the front of your mind, always. I want to end with good luck to you, and I hope all of your dreams come true. ❤

  37. Hopefullyblue August 4, 2011 at 8:07 am #

    Hello,
    i have watched the show both seasons and you are by far the best people. I loved yall so much and watching each and every episode I loved the more I got to see of you to!!. I am so glad they showed everything you are going through because when my partner graduates we will be trying for a child of our own. Neither one of us knew about the things you would have to go through and seeing it from you two makes us see. Thanks so much for letting everyone be a part of your life and I do hope that you continue with your blog. I also do hope that there is a third season if not please post some videos of you two… Just a friendly update. Thanks again so much.

  38. elyima August 4, 2011 at 8:21 am #

    Cori and Kacy,

    I have been checking daily for this update! Thank you for sharing more information about your journey with us! My wife and I are in the same boat. We have completed four cycles of trying to conceive and although it does get frustrating, consuming, depressing, etc…we push on. I think a lot of people have a misconception that it’s SO easy to get pregnant, especially when you are using AI. Thank you for offering a perspective to the public that shows what it’s really like, and how much of a roller coaster this journey can be. I also found http://www.itsconceivablenow.com because of you guys. Thank you SO much for that! It’s a great site and I’ll be writing for them a bit in the future about our journey too! We wish you the best and will keep our fingers crossed for you.

    Lots of love,
    @elyima and @mrselyima
    2mommies2love.wordpress.com

  39. Emily August 4, 2011 at 8:49 am #

    Ah! I love you two. Definitely my favorite on the show. If anyone deserves to be parents it’s you guys. It breaks my heart that you’ve been unsuccessful but don’t let it stop you! I look up to you guys and you give me much hope as my future as a gay parent! Good luck 🙂 keep us updated!!!

  40. Maren Christensen August 4, 2011 at 8:58 am #

    Cori,
    I want to share with you my journey on becoming prego! My partner and I went through IUI 9 times only to have a miscarriage and other than that nothing! Our fertility doctor told us to do IVF it is more expensive but the success rate is much higher, like you I tried clomid and the hormone shots with IUI and got no where it is heartbreaking each cycle to hope and pray so hard and get no baby! We weighed our options and decided that the money we were paying each month with no luck we would just pay for IVF! Let me tell you it is very hard on your body but we got pregnant on the first try and now have a 7 month old daughter named Jensen! The process of becoming parents is very hard, emotional and trying but I hope by hearing stories of success you will stay positive and keep trying because you guys will be great parents and it will happen!! If you have any questions I would love to help email me at marenmarie22@gmail.com! It will become a distant memory all the struggle when your holding your baby the journey will be so worth it!! Good luck!!!
    Maren

  41. Wendy Laborde-Calise August 4, 2011 at 9:52 am #

    I first hand know the frustration you are going through and wanted to let you know that IT WILL HAPPEN! I went through the infertility process and it was a very rough road of emotions. I can tell you this after a year and half of trying we welcomed our twins into this world in Feb 2011. Please keep the faith as hard as that is and I know. You will both be amazing parents, your child will be so lucky!

    FYI-Both me and my sister-law were helped by one of the top fertility doctors in the state CA. We both have a total of 5 wonderful children because of him. He is wonderful and his success rate is very high. Please take a chance and look at his website below…I know he will be able to help you guys!

    http://fcare.com/

  42. Christine Garza August 4, 2011 at 9:58 am #

    Cori & Kacy- I went through some serious family trauma in March 2011 which caused me to break down, leaving my partner of three years, our home, and my job. Watching you two on the show made me realize what an amazing life Sara and I had together (we, too, were beginning to explore our baby plan), and that I needed to give my life with her the chance it deserved. Sara and I have never been stronger or more in love, thanks in part to watching your journey on The Real L Word. Hearing Kacy say that love like yours doesn’t just “happen” affirmed that our relationship was worth it, too. Please know that Sara and I are praying for you and Kacy to be delivered a happy, healthy, loving little soul. We love you guys. If you’re ever in San Antonio, y’all have a place to stay with us! -Chrissy & Sara

  43. Cynthia August 4, 2011 at 10:24 am #

    Cory,

    You and Kacy are an amazing couple. My wife and I enjoyed watching you on your journey on this season of TRLW.

    You both have a wonderful bond and will be great parents. Just stay strong and keep the faith. I am a huge believer that everything happens for a reason and it helps me get through tough times. I know that you will be blessed with children.

    My wife and I are both nurses too so I you have any questions feel fre to ask!!

    We also hope you come back for season 3 if there is one 🙂

    You are in our thoughts and prayers and we are sending positive vibes your way!!

    Keep strong!!!

  44. Kelly B August 4, 2011 at 11:20 am #

    Cori and Kacy, I just love you guys! I truly enjoyed watching your story! You love and respect for one another is very touching! Mypartner and I just love the chemistry that you two have! Best of luck to you both!

  45. Stephanie C August 4, 2011 at 11:38 am #

    Just want to say that I am a huge fan of the show! You and Kacy are the ideal couple in every way. I know that your edited lives on the show leave out several aspects of daily life but your interactions with one another in all situations speak volumes about your care and devotion to one another. A true partner is one who loves you in all situations equatlly and you obviously have that. I have no doubt that higher powers will bless you with a baby to love. I follow you guys on twitter and facebook and look forward to good news! Couples like you guys give people hope to find that love in their own lives…gay, straight, pink, blue, short, tall… We all want that and I’m so glad when two people so perfect for one another find it! Much love and many blessings…

  46. Nora August 4, 2011 at 11:39 am #

    My husband & I have been trying to conceive for 7 cycles now. Doctors have checked us & say we are good…just be patient. Working w/women who seem to fall pregnant w/o even trying doesn’t make me feel any better. Watching your story helped me realize I am not alone in the world. I thank you and Kacy for being open. For bringing out of the land of “reproductive failure” I was living in. The tears have stopped and the warrior attitude is now in full force! Hoping you keep up w/this blog! I am interested to know why your doctor put you on Clomid/hormones when they seem to believe you were ovulating normally on the show? I too tried predictor kits and never got a smiley face. Told my doctor and she only drew blood…told me I ovulated…and to relax. Curious to know if there are more options I could explore w/pills?

  47. kaye August 4, 2011 at 11:45 am #

    Don’t give up! U ladies will have your baby! With anything in life I guess, u just can’t give up! When it knocks u down, just brush off ur shoulders and do it again!

  48. CieraJade August 4, 2011 at 12:19 pm #

    I love you both so much!! I wish nothing but the best for you and your little bundle- or bundles of joy that will be with you sooner or later. Don’t give up on hope, this will work out for the both of you I know it… Plus if you guys give up, who are us other lesbian couples suppose to look up too 😉
    XOXO, Ciera

  49. KimJoy August 4, 2011 at 12:33 pm #

    You guys are amazing! It’s so wonderful to see a couple so in love 🙂 Prayers to you and the beautiful soul that will be given to you one day. The perfect one is looking just for you guys to be their parents! Good luck & much love to you both!

  50. Hali Cloutman August 4, 2011 at 1:07 pm #

    I know I don’t know either of you personally, and like many others, got to watch and fall in love with you and your life story on the show. But I honestly just asked my husband if he would give you as much sperm as you needed (free of charge, no attachments, having the adoption papers ready for Kacy) until you had a baby. But he didn’t think it was such a good idea. Some people might think that’s crazy, but I think what you two are going through, is so unfair, and I wanted to help. Since I can’t offer sperm, and knowing how expensive this whole process is, I would love to send whatever I could to help. If that is possible, please let me know. With as many fans as you two have, I don’t recommend putting your address online..lol. But if you had a P.O. Box or something..that might work.

    I wish nothing but the best for you both!

    Love, Hali

  51. Leah Gazzana August 4, 2011 at 1:28 pm #

    You and Kacy were amazing on the show. My partner and I are just starting the process. We tried 5 years ago when I was to be the carrier of the spawn. My store was open so to speak, but the eggs were expired. So here we are desperately wanting a child. However we are still facing hurdles with her health. So we may end up going the route of adoption.

    Anywho thanks for your inspiring story of faith and love! I have added u both to my twitter and wish u many awesome warm fuzzies of hope!

    Leah

    Ps my iPhone has a mind of it’s own and auto correct is the devil

    pss. I quit smoking 4.5 years ago, so I know the struggle! How are u making out with that hurdle?

  52. Julie August 4, 2011 at 2:14 pm #

    My fiancee and I are planning a commitment ceremony for May and plan to start a family soon after. It has been so reassuring seeing someone else go through the process so we know what to expect. It is greatly appreciated that you guys were brave enough to share your story with the lesbo world. Thank you! I am so glad to see you guys have not given up! It was disappointing to hear you say “this is our last chance” about your second try. Everytime you said it I replied, “there is more sperm in the world ladies!” lol It is obvious you two are loving, kind, generous people. You want to be moms and you will be no matter how it ends up happening! Please don’t ever give up and please keep us updated so we can continue to cheer you on and congratulate you when the day finally comes! Best wishes, your fellow future lesbo mom 🙂

  53. Jennifer August 4, 2011 at 2:38 pm #

    This is very heartbreaking for me to read. I’m so very sorry that this insemination was not successful, but don’t give up. You have so many of us rooting for the both of you! Think of how loved this baby will be when it finally arrives. Just have hope!

    You both have become people I look up to, in more ways then one. The love you two have for one another is incredible, eye opening and inspiring and it will get you through the hardest of times.
    Love you both!
    Ps- I wish I was a man and could donate some baby batter!

  54. Kathrin August 4, 2011 at 2:46 pm #

    Hallo,I’m a 35 Women from Germany,I married my wife in January 2010. An in June 2010 our Son was born.We are a Rainbow-Family,2 Mums&2 Dads, and it works:-) I just want to say, do not give up!!Cordial Greetings

  55. Julie August 4, 2011 at 2:58 pm #

    Cori and Kacy, what an inspiration you have been to me. Your love, your relationship and your faith in each other and in life really touched me, and it has been very refreshing to see a settled, loving and very relatable lesbian couple on TV.

    I wish you the best of luck with the baby project!

    Very big hugs from your friend (yeah, it is apparently possible to feel so connected to people you watch on television, that you will think of them as your friends. That’s a first for me 🙂 ) Julie from Denmark.

  56. Nikki August 4, 2011 at 3:11 pm #

    I wish you both the best of luck with everything. just remember, even when things get rough, that everything happens for a reason. Never give up. And always have faith. You are both strong and brave for sharing your story with so many people. (Even though we all know there is more than the “baby” “sperm” & “quit smoking” that was portrayed on tv) I commend you both and truly believe that with time, everything will turn out for you guys. *heads up. Hearts up. Hopes up* -Nikki 🙂

  57. Tristana W August 4, 2011 at 3:33 pm #

    God blesses good people. And you two indeed that. I say little prayers at night for you two and the soon to be miracle child. With love from Texas. Xoxo

  58. Olga Lazo August 4, 2011 at 5:05 pm #

    I absolutely love you guys!!! Definitely my favorite girls on TRLW by far!!! You guys are so real & so great!!! I just wanna say I am praying for you both in ur journey to having a baby!!!

  59. Kerry August 4, 2011 at 5:10 pm #

    The love between you is so obvious and amazing!! I loved watching you guys on the show and am hoping for another season!! I have 4 children- Sophia 10 Mikey 8 1/2 Celia 7 1/2 and Nicholas 5… Me and my husband got married almost 12 years ago. On our first anniversary we went to Arizona, and there we bought a kokapelli……a symbol of fertility. 4 months later we were pregnant and didn’t stop lol.. A close friend of ours had To do fertility and got pregnant and lost her baby- 4 times :(. They just couldn’t understand why. Since we were done having our babies- we gave her our kokapelli – and her next session she became pregnant and gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. Its worth a shot to get yourselves a kokapelli 🙂 Even though we are strangers – I’m so grateful for your blog and love being your fan! Kerry 🙂

  60. J August 4, 2011 at 5:17 pm #

    Keep your head up. Stay positive. Sending out positive vibes to you ladies.

  61. Greysi August 4, 2011 at 5:32 pm #

    Well I just wanted to say that u guys have open my eye to having babys I though it was gonna be easy too but I see its not…and I do wish u guys the best in life and I know really soon god will give u and kacy the gift of being a mommy and I’m really gonna be praying for u guys……and its really nice that u guys are doing this for ur fan this is helping a lot of lesbian on how the proccess work on having a baby thank you times a million and don’t worry really soon u will be blogging about ur baby u gonna see I wish u and kacy the best of luck 😀

    Always
    Greysi

    P.s
    Don’t give up anything is possible in life if u work hart for it and really soon I know it will happen for guys
    XOXO

  62. southbaygay August 4, 2011 at 5:48 pm #

    So happy that you allow is all inti your lives. I think that there are a few of us that can make sure that you keep us updated as much as possible! Hope you had a great day!

  63. Heather August 4, 2011 at 6:46 pm #

    Cori, First my wife and I are HUGE fans of you and Kacy. We loved you guys on the show. We too have been trying to conceive for a few months now and we were really able to feel your pain and frustration. I know it is hard, very month to keep trying and waiting to just try and try again. Also while watching other heterosexual friends and family all around you who seem to keep turning out babies from all directions. But we are big believers that every thing happens for a reason and when the time is right it will happen. Just try to stay relaxed and not stress and over analyze every little feeling in your body, believe me I know it’s easier said then done. You two seem to be great people and really support and love each other, so you deserve to add to your family and we wish you the best and our thoughts and prayers are with you both through this tough time.

    One other note, I would like to say thank you on behalf of all your fans. We all see how involved and busy you are so for you to take the time to read and even respond to people is truly awesome. I use to talk to one of your cast mates a lot during season 1, we even went down to LA for her birthday and hung out with her. But it seems her and a lot of the other girls don’t seem to find the time to even acknowledge their fans. Though we all know how busy life gets but the occasional response means a lot. So again, Thank you! You two girls are awesome and we wish you all the happiness you deserve.

  64. Lindsey August 4, 2011 at 7:40 pm #

    Good luck and lots of sticky baby dust

  65. Liz Saragosa August 4, 2011 at 10:01 pm #

    Hi. I am super glad you have a blog! I am also ready to have kids but don’t have the funds to even try once. So it is hard to hear that my one shot at it will likely end in failure. I just hope you both stay strong and continue this journey because you two deserve to be mommies. Good luck and lots of baby dust your way!

  66. Katie Eichenberg August 4, 2011 at 11:38 pm #

    It makes my heart sad to hear you aren’t pregnant. I always feel somewhat guilty when people are trying to conceive and can’t. I got pregnant at 18 by “accident”. My son is the best thing to ever happen to me. I wouldn’t change anything about him. But Itjust makes me sad that such good and deserving people have to struggle to have a child. I wish you both all of luck in the world. You are in my prayers. Hopefully God will send you a little of my fertility your way.

  67. annie y August 5, 2011 at 1:01 am #

    I am a person that was adopted. So many children need parents willing to give them a chance. Please consider adopting if you cannot get pregnant.

    My motto is ” choice, not chance, determines destiny ”

    Good luck to you both.

  68. Tiff August 5, 2011 at 8:03 am #

    Hi guys!! First like every one else i love the show…and it was fun watching you guys!! I am a mom to a daughter….so I know why you want tp experience bringing a life into the world……i was wondering..since I read that you guys were already 10k drop if once you hit your 5k mark which brings u to the allotted 15k u guys said you were setting out for this……what are your next steps?? Have you guys considered surrogacy??? I know it’s what most gay men do….but had it every been something you might do…..sure it’s costly…and I know that it separates the other partner even further from the process but at least you know that someone who is fertile can produce a child as well….
    just a random thought……

    But if that doesn’t work or ode all those hormones…i read that w sweet potatoes make u very fertile….so ready up on those sweet potatoes and happy baby making…….

    Sorry…if this comes off un believing and hopeless to you carrying on your own….but I am a straight girl who

  69. Tiff August 5, 2011 at 8:08 am #

    it published before I was done……

    I was just saying that I’m a straight fertile girl who can feel my eggs falling..it seems…..lol!! So I was just asking because they are terribly fertile woman our there who are willing so you guys can have your family!!

  70. Kelly (rock_et_ship - via Instagram) August 5, 2011 at 8:40 pm #

    First up, you two are great. So honest, open and fun. Thanks for sharing your happy lesbo world. 😉 We know your journey so well. My gf and I have been trying for the last year and a half or so. What an emotional rollercoaster! Always thought that it’s such a bummer you have to field post 2-week-wait news when your possibly PMSing, right? What’s up with that lameness? 😉

    Couple little thoughts…after my 5 or 6th insem try I got an Hysterosalpingogram (the Fallopian Tube test/flush – cost about $300). For me, it showed that my left tube was blocked. Not the end of the world. We just had to regroup and only insemed when I was ovulating on the right. Then at least we weren’t wasting sperm/$ on a side that wasn’t do’in.

    We eventually switched gears to my gf trying. (My work schedule was booty, and too stressfulI for baby-making I begrudgingly decided.) After a few tries she took a low dose of injectable hormones to strengthen her eggs and she ended up growing a crazy amount of follicles. We had to switch gears that cycle to IVF, which we’d never planned on doing. Yes it’s more expensive, but what an amazing feeling to feel like you have more control of the situation. We didn’t have to worry about egg meeting sperm any more, we cut to the chase and emotionally it was like finally turning a page. 
    She got preggers on that 1st try. We’re still in the early anything could happen stage, but we’re hoping!

    We went to C.A.R.E Fertility in Glendale for the IVF. Super nice staff and great doctor!

    You’re young, healthy and happy. I’m sure it’s 
    just a matter of time for you. Sending you all 
    sorts of ~*~baby making vibes~*~!!! Wishing you
     all the best. Catch ya at a mommy & me class one day, I know it! 😉

  71. Liz August 6, 2011 at 2:38 pm #

    We love you guys!! I guess I should have read this before posting on your other messages. Ha! Oh well. Maybe I should start blogging again since we r trying, once again to have bambino #2. So thrilling… And so not. I know you know what I mean. 😉 #1 took us twice. #2 gas taken us longer. We miscarried the first time, and then we have insem’d 5 times since. We r on #6. I get your pain. Keep up the positivity and outlook. You have a fab support system. We love you!!

    Liz and Tricia
    Temecula, CA

  72. heather August 7, 2011 at 7:24 pm #

    My girlfriend and I are behind you guys 100%. We are waiting to see if the two of you are on the next season (you better be or we will stop watching). We don’t want any children of our own, but support you guys all the way. Hope to hear that you are pregnant soon!

  73. Leticia Alvarez August 8, 2011 at 12:43 pm #

    I just wanted to say I adore you both.. you guys sometimes remind me of me & my girlfriend.. me being the one always having some kind of meltdown with my gf always trying to bring a smile to my face.. I wish you guys the best & I am praying to the fertility gods for you. Leti

  74. Cassie Saiz August 9, 2011 at 8:24 pm #

    Hi I feel like I connected more with the two of you. Me and my wife have been together for 6 years and been TTC for 3 of those years. I hope you become blessed soon. Baby Dust

  75. Lene August 10, 2011 at 2:09 am #

    Hey Cori, as many others, I guess I found your blog when I was trying to search online to find out if you and Kacy were pregnant yet! Me and my wife (yes also legally married) have been following “The real L word” from Norway, and found your story specially interesting since we’re going thru the same. We have been searching for the right donor for over a year and in May we had our first insemination at Storkklinikk in Denmark. My wife is American form NYC and I am Norwegian, and we live in Norway at the moment because as a lesbian couple we have more rights here. My wife will f.ex be the child’s legally parent from birth.
    We wish you good luck!

  76. get a free iphone 5 August 14, 2011 at 9:15 am #

    Your web site won’t display correctly on my android – you might want to try and repair that

  77. GLBTmoms August 22, 2011 at 1:02 pm #

    It took my wife and I 3 IUI’s to get pregnant partly because we did not listen to our RE. If we had listened to her, we would’ve kept missing ovulation, because my wife ovulates VERY quickly (12-24 hours instead of the 36-48 hours our RE told us to wait). So we lied and said, yes ovulation happened at this time and we need to come in NOW. I am part of a very large community of mostly lesbians who are trying to conceive or have done it. Here’s my spiel, having seen hundreds of different circumstances, problems and success stories. Learn about your body. Read the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility, take your temperature every morning and study your discharge to know when you’re ovulating without wasting money on those smiley face sticks. BTW, you can buy cheap ovulation sticks and pregnancy tests online in bulk for way cheaper…we did it and they worked great. Learn how quickly you ovulate- try it 3 times a day starting at cycle day 10. If they don’t work, use monitoring if your doctor is not already. Serious monitoring, not just checking to see if you’re ready to pop. Using 2 vials per time does NOT have enough of an increased effect on getting pregnant- it is not worth the waste of money. On the show, you both were using extremely expensive sperm. You don’t have to. Shop around. We spent $250 per vial on ours; we got pregnant on only $1000 in the end and have a beautiful son. Don’t continue to do IUI past 12 tries…move to IVF. It’s just not worth it to keep doing them indefinitely. If your eggs don’t produce quality embryos with IVF, consider using your partner’s eggs instead. I have seen more than one instance where perfectly healthy, young women had poor egg quality for no explainable reason and they only found out after 2 years worth of IUI and thousands of dollars on multiple tries of IVF. See what your insurance covers- IVF can sometimes be covered even for gay women. I hope it’s not much longer for you two. I can see you’ll make good moms. Hang in there and good luck.

  78. Rachel September 6, 2011 at 3:15 pm #

    You two are sooo incrediably amazing together! Your relationship makes me want to better myself to make my relationship as incredible as yours! If you don’t mind me asking…who preposed to who and how did they do it?

  79. Arianna Quesada September 30, 2011 at 6:47 pm #

    so my wife to be and i are looking to start the process of having children…. i was hoping you wouldnt mind telling me from your experience how the whole process goes… ive read up on it a lot and was just hoping to get someones perspective on it…. congrats by the way….

  80. Faye April 1, 2012 at 12:53 pm #

    I love you guys!!!

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